Visiting Alzheimer's - How to Visit With Someone Who Has Dementia

Just like everyone else, people with memory loss like to have visitors. Alzheimer's disease may cause forgetfulness and confusion, but people are still people. They might not always behave exactly like they used to, but that's the disease. The person inside is still the same, so chalk up their new peculiarities to the dementia and don't take much of anything personally. Illness that cause brain changes can make people to do and say things that seem strange. Try to "go with the flow" and you can still have a very successful visit.

To effectively communicate with people who have dementia it is important to remember a few simple things:

1. What you do is more important than what you say. Your body language and your tone of voice are very important when talking to someone with dementia. Speak slowly and distinctly, using words that the person you are talking with can understand. If he or she doesn't seem to comprehend, choose short sentences and different words rather than repeating yourself exactly.

2. Avoid questions whenever you can. If you have to ask a question, try to make it a "yes" or "no" question. People with Alzheimer's Disease often have difficulty expressing complex thoughts. Don't insist on an answer if the person seems to be getting frustrated or anxious.

3. Don't worry about the "truth." If you can get the person talking, don't worry if the conversation makes little sense or if the person with dementia is saying things that you know are wrong or not true. Fact and fantasy often get mixed up in the brain of someone with dementia. If what the person is saying doesn't lead into dangerous behavior ("I'm going to eat this can of lye now"), try to go with the flow and avoid correcting. You'll both have more fun.

If you begin to feel overwhelmed by this new way of visiting someone with a dementia illness, just sit back and try a few moments of companionable silence. If you sense that the person you're visiting is becoming anxious or stressed, cut your visit short and say good-bye. Even a five or ten minute visit may be enough to make someone feel loved and cared for, and more may be too much.